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The Hobbit: An Expected Voyage (into pirate territory)

This period is perfect for various reflections, and judging by 2013, which was a mixed bag for many of us, not all thoughts are positive.

It seems that The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey has just snagged the top price:

The Most Pirated Film of the Year Award!

Erm, congrats?

It seems that there were about 8.4 million illegal downloads in 2013.

See, I knew I should have resisted the urge and just waited patiently for the DVD, then there’d be 8 399 999 downloads…

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Is this worrying? Sure.

But judging by my own pirate behaviour, many of those went on to pump a lot of their money into the Tolkien/Jackson machine.

Aye, come to think of it, that stream from AgzyM to Middle Earth (and Sir PJ’s Hobbit hole) is still flowing and will likely do so well into  2015 and beyond.

A good percentage of that 8.4 million are people who probably wouldn’t have spent money seeing the film anyway, these are the people who don’t mind poor quality and sound as long as there’s something happening on-screen.

It’s also not like the movie turned out to be a box-office bomb- a sunken chest with no booty.

We seem to compulsively compare Desolation of Smaug with AUJ, let’s see how it fairs up this this particular category  throughout 2014…

Holy Dwarfballs, Desolation of Smaug is dragonlicious!

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I’m back from my adventure, I met a group of rowdy dwarves AND I saw Smaug the dragon (albeit portrayed on the New Zealand Air plane at Munich Airport).

I had an amazing time and will be sharing the highlights in upcoming posts.

Today I’ll focus The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug which I saw on Friday at Leicester Square Odeon at 12.45 courtesy of the wonderful Guylty who gifted me my precious tickets  🙂

This is not a review, just a few observations.

I’ve only seen the film once and will not be continuing my gushing in a cinema till it’s out on the 27th of December, when Poland catches up to the rest of the world…

I finally went to see it with my BFF who is most certainly not a Tolkien fan but decided he could use a 3 hour nap.

As we were queueing up to enter he turned to me and said:

Holy fuck, look at me standing in line with all the other geeks!

Yup babe, you’ve finally arrived in Coolsville, welcome 🙂

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I’m pretty sure I wrote about how weird (and not in a good way…) I found the 48 fps.

I felt like I was watching a program on The Discover Channel HD and that’s not necessarily what you want from a film.

This time around it did not bug me but at all, although the difference between 24 and 48 fps must be significant as Max was traumatized and kept muttering about it looking like an 80s TV series.

Oh dear, guess maybe the technology won’t win movie goers over any time soon.

I wonder if it didn’t bug me because I knew what to expect or because on the whole many scenes in DOS are dark or contain fight sequences and the new technology lends itself to that better.

As Richard said, the film is fast paced from the get go and doesn’t ease up for a second.

I’ll just say it, in my humble opinion it wiped the floor with AUJ!

I’ve always said that for me AUJ dragged a tad in places and it felt one scene too long, although which one I would eliminate I cannot tell you.

I actually made a rookie mistake of gulping down what was the equivalent of a bucket of Diet Coke prior to venturing to Middle Earth and I was hard pressed to find a moment that seemed appropriate to sneak out to the loo.

They should start handing out Hobbit themed potties at the cinema, just an idea…

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Anyway, I feel like they have managed to recapture that LOTR magic that was somewhat lacking in this last Hobbit part, but I refuse to believe that it was as simple as introducing the elves, although Thranduil had me snapping my fingers and saying: Bitch so sassy! 😉

I really enjoy the introduction of new characters, including Tauriel and can hardly blame her for falling for Aidan Turner Kili , so no shade throwing please!

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And Smaug!!! Oh Smaug the Stupendous!

Now I know why Cumberbatch is so adamant that playing this part entailed more that simply lending your voice.

I found the whole film ridiculously exciting and I think Sir PJ may well have learned a few things from AUJ and tweaked DOS so it would give LOTR fans more of what they love!

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I can’t really write much about Thorin apart from the fact that I have a thing for Richard unravelling his characters very much like Lucas in season 10.

On the one hand clearly greed and the ever present obsession clouds his mind, but he is still very much protective of his company and kin.

I can’t even tell you how much I enjoyed the Thorin/Thranduil faceoff, but there’s less cattiness on Ru Paul’s Drag Race!

Now now, calm down, you’re both pretty 😉

What were your favourite DOS parts?

Who wins the title of King of Sass?

Richard, let’s hear you say: Ich bin ein Berliner!

Dear Richard,

We haven’t had a note from you I quite some time, so I decided to open up this line of communication again.

I’m very pleased that you’re a little further East and closer to me, even though that means that I won’t be stalking checking you out on the red carpet in London this week.

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I really do hope that you have a great time this evening and I will definitely be following the festivities HERE at 6.20 pm (GMT+1 which is my kind of time zone).

It’s been quite cold in this part of the world and we’ve had heavy snowfall, so here are some items that I think will make your red carpet event more enjoyable.

Firstly, make sure you pull out your long johns from the bottom of your suitcase:

long johns

I know often your suits are *cough* form-fitting, but let’s make sure everything is nice and snug.

If it’s good enough for woodcutters and crab fishermen, it’s good enough for adorable British actors…

It’s also important to stay warm from the inside, so how about this:

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Now, a hip flask may disturb the silhouette of your suit and you just know we’ll be obsessing over each and every bump, so how about a fun alternative:

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How many people you know who take a St. Bernard to a red carpet event?

You’d be a hit and people will be asking: Benedict who?

Chicks dig a hot man with an adorable dog, so maybe you’ll actually score manage to find other ways to stay warm.

I will be watching, cheering for you, experiencing my own RA heating effect 🙂

All the best and good luck for tonight,

Agzy

All I Want for Christmas is RA! (and that Thorin Anime Doll)

If you’ve watched the clip where TODAY’s Phin Wong asks Richard what he’d like for Christmas.

Sadly me as his stocking stuffer was not his answer…

If you’re wondering what the heck Richard is on about, here it is:

thorin pop vinyl figure

The Thorin Anime Doll or Thorin Pop Vinyl Figure, as the rest of the world calls it, would also be on my wish list!

I’ve been trying to get my hands on one, but it seems that they are currently only available in the US.

Thorin pop vinyl

They won’t be made available at Forbidden Planet till the end of December, just when everyone is pretty much shopped out.

Thorin/Richard, as always, ever so elusive…

Update:

Let’s just say I’ve been a very good girl this year, so Anime Thorin MIGHT find it’s way to me after all.

Thanks for the advice on where to look for him 😉

While I was sleeping…

I had the best of intentions:

I took my laptop to bed with me, set my alarm clock for 3.30am and was all set to join my RA peeps to enjoy the DOS festivities.

The alarm clock rang, I rolled over, switched it off and went back to catching Zzzzz’s.

Sure, probably reading North & South fanfiction till past midnight didn’t help, neither did the realisation that I had to be up at 6am.

While I was catching up on my beauty sleep, Richard was painting the town… black?

The styling was perfection, check out the length of the cuffs!

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The thing is Richard, when I go left, you go right.

When I go to London, you go to Berlin.

When I go to sleep, you go out to party.

When I live in NY, you are in London, when I live in Europe, you move to the States.

This just won’t do!

When I want to get excited about new projects, you go mute.

When I fall for Porter or Lucas, you plan your exit strategy and they get killed off.

When I fall for the nape curls, you lop them off.

When I am enthralled with you, you have no idea I exist!

I guess that’ll have to do!

What to expect when you’re expecting (The Hobbit Fan Event on Monday)

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The Nov 4th Fan Event for The Hobbit is upon us and at this point all we can do is speculate what treats are in store for us.

As I was going down my Twitter feed it was wonderful to see so many of my RA friends score tickets to see the cast in either NY or London.

Magzy asked me whether I was jealous and I truthfully answered that yes, but not in the obvious way.

It would be much worse if Richard was in London as it’d be extremely difficult but doable to try to make it work.

As RA is in NY, beside logistic issues (like a 10 hour flight), the US isn’t getting a tourist penny from me until they get rid of tourist visas (seeing that we ARE citizens of the EU).

Therefore, there wasn’t any way in hell to bend reality to fit with my fangirl desires.

Zdjęcie: The new trailer for The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug will be unveiled tomorrow (Tuesday, October 1st) at 6am PT / 9am ET!Share if you're counting down!

I have to admit that reading fan encounters always delight me and I hope our fellow admirers show us with insider info.

 I’m always proud of the conduct of our fandom members on RA impact, despite probably being on the verge of exploding, they usually manage a calm cool exterior and represent us well.

It’s also easier for me to live vicariously through another fan, I can just imagine myself in this situation, I giggle (and sometime squirm) reading the details and I get a rush that is probably almost as intense as the lucky fan felt on meeting Richard… almost…

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The event will take place at 11pm on Monday AT (meaning Agzy time), so could be worse.

I’ll be bundled up in bed with my laptop, refreshing the page every few seconds, trying not to think about having to get up the next day at 6am.

I’ll give watching everything go down in real time a go, although it felt odd during 2012 SD: Comic-Con and I quickly abandoned trying to keep up.

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What can we expect?

Difficult to guess.

My bet is that because there are four host cities, we aren’t going to see that much of Richard, especially that he’ll be joined by a teenage girl Orlando Bloom and much of the attention will be focused on Legolas (the name comes from the Scottish ‘lass’ and Lego because he delivers his lines like he was made of plastic… OK, not really…).

The event poster claims there will be live Q&A and exclusive footage shown, but I’ll be the judge of how exclusive that footage feels 😉

The event is dubbed a FAN event, so I hope we’ll be able to satisfy our FAN appetites!

What would you like to see on Monday?

Are there any questions you’d like Richard to be asked?

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